Deprogramming

I was the star of a family constellation in Croatia. Cried my self – imposed restriction out, so loudly, I had to do breathing exercises to be able to still stand. The clarity of the truth I discovered lying in myself beats the clarity of the clearest crystal.

And I don’t cry. I am most of the time the queen of swords, the king of swords, sometimes. I was on holiday, at my sister’s. This constellation was not programmed, I wasn’t going to influence things to happen, not more than only saying I am interested, the facilitator wasn’t going to make to many efforts to organize it. Even when there, when my hand put itself up, to ‘work’, the facilitator said she is thinking of not working with me, I was thinking to accept it…even said that. The person chosen to impersonate my future (a mixture between The Fool and a page) had to live, stayed only for the period I was ‘in work’. The whole event had to be in English, as I don’t know Croatian. And, well, so on… all sorts of “no’s”. The probability for my experience to take place, measured with human accepted science tools has been somewhere very close to zero.

If there was to make a list with ‘How can you tell’, I would say ‘You know you are on the right way when such situation like the above one, take place? The thing that made it possible was the simple being, not restricting a natural instinct of doing. When we “are”, the things we are finding ourselves doing, come from a holly paradigm. This lack of restriction manifested in many people involved, but the number of people is not important; whole worlds can move in this same way – at the same time – felt and detached.

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